Wednesday 23 November 2011

Dear Expat Wife...

Are you a Trailing Spouse or a Princess in Paradise?




Wiki explains 'the trailing spouse' and I found this a real interesting read. I especially like the info relating to some research into the trailing spouse phenomenon. 

Wiki does not explain 'princess in paradise' :-D  But, yes, it does make me smile :-)




So, is an expat wife really a princess?  We're all still taking on the roles of homemaker, mummy, loving wife and are 'attempting' to do the following;

keep kids happy,
keep kids up to date with school and home work,
keep husband happy,
keep ourselves happy, healthy 'n' sane,
make ourselves thin - a bit irrelevant but we all do it! :-)

Doing all of the above (and more) without the help of family and close friends.  Trying to succeed and help our kids cope with the emotional challenge of understanding why we live (sometimes) at the other side of the world.  Telling the kids;

No, Grandparents aren't able to pop around;
midweek for babysitting and playtime
or for lunch on Sunday, 
Yes, of course, their new school and
new friends will (eventually) begin to feel 'right'

There is also the thoughts to Grandparents...is it really fair that a Grandparent should only see their grandchildren twice a year (maximum)? Is it really fair that grandchildren should only see their Grandparents twice a year?  Our children are having a good life, great schooling, lots of attention, coming home from school and swimming but are they missing out on a 'proper' family life?   I quote my Mum here "I have a deep felt heart ache at seeing my only daughter and her grandchildren just twice a year".


Yes, the emotional cost of being an 'expat family' est énorme! 


So, am I the 'Trailing Spouse'?

No, I'm not, thank you! I don't like the sound of either 'trailing' or 'spouse'! I didn't 'trail' anywhere behind my husband, we made a joint decision to come to Singapore and I'm not 'trailing' in the footsteps of his career either. I'm sure there are a lot more expat wives out there who totally agree that moving abroad is a decision based on the family as an whole and not just steps up Mr Man's career ladder.


So, no trailing spouse here - now that does make me smile :-)

Finally then, "am I the Princess in Paradise?"
Well, if the Jimmy Choo fits - yep, I'll wear it
and feel like a Princess xx :-)

Dear Expat Wife - for your pain, you surely deserve the gain, right!

If your days turn less smiley then check this link out expat wives prayer I guarantee it will make a sad face turn up into a smile :-)  You are not alone...


My Prince charming is in Thailand right now but he's taking this Princess to Hong Kong at the weekend :-)  I'll check in to tell you how Hong Kong is.


Kisses 'n' smiles from me xx :-)

Tuesday 22 November 2011

sleepless 'n' Singapore

Why, do I not sleep at all well when my husband is away?  Anyone would think that, as he travels so damn much that I would 'eventually' get used it...but no!


Last week Mr Man was away for 2 nights, in the time he was away I slept for 7 hours total!  Gosh I was absolutely 'knacked' and did not have a smiley face! :-(  Yes I was tired, but why then did I not sleep?  A little afraid of the dark? A little afraid of being alone? Goodness only knows, but the minute he got back on Friday I was straight into bed 'n' fast on!  Erm, do you think he was smiling? ;-)

I do actually believe that sleep deprivation is a form of torture!  See this link...wiki/Sleep_deprivation if it doesn't interest you then reading it could make you sleepy :-)



Yes, I was like the mother of a newborn!  All us Mums know how thoroughly 'shattered' we are as 'new mums'....actually believing that our children will 'never' sleep.  I remember my Mum 'n' Dad telling me that I did not sleep until I was 5 years old!  No, I did not believe Mum 'n' Dad either - until I had my second son and, he proved my Mum 'n' Dad right by not sleeping himself for 5 years! 

I did have some smiles while Mr Man was away though...My Chinese lesson, I had to cancel the last 2 weeks for one reason and another, so to get back to it was a bit scary - I was sure I had forgotten everything - yes, I had, well almost!  I did Birthdays and now know how to sing 'Happy Birthday to you' in Chinese!  Excellent, that will come in useful :-)  Still, Chinese lessons are making me smile and my teacher has such patience and gives lots of encouragement - it is fantastic :-)


To finish, here are a few of my favourite places in Singapore...I hope they make you smile :-)

Singapore River, bum boat 'n' Fullerton

East Coast Beach

Gardens by the Bay

soooo colourful, love this building

Fullerton Hotel

Kallang Bridge

East Coast Beach - morning

Sleep time now in my beautiful Singapore :-)

kisses 'n' smiles from me xx :-)